Put Down the Ben & Jerry’s: Haley Joel Osment Has A Better Idea.

It’s snowing. The seasons are changing. Daylight Savings Time knocked the crap out of me, and I’ve been incredibly, annoyingly, repeatedly FRUSTRATED.

AAAAARRRRRGH!

And what lies ahead? The holidays. More change. More planning. More events.

Oh, hello Ben & Jerry’s. Where are you, Merlot? Let’s stay in bed instead of getting up and figuring out what to wear to run in the ever-changing cold temps.

I mean, I’ll figure out winter gear again. In December.

AAAAAARRRRRGH!!!

Seriously, don’t talk to me.

I’m just like little, scared Haley Joel Osment. I want to pretend like I can’t hear the ghosts. I want to hide.

Stop following me, frustration. Stop opening the kitchen cupboards. Stop scratching me! I want to hide in a tiny little fort with a glass of wine.

Can you relate? Oh, you’re crunching a giant bag of Doritos right now? I get that.

You know what we have to do, right? Like little Haley Joel Osment, we have to talk to the ghosts.

Yeah, I know. There’s Mint Chocolate Cookie. And Pinot Noir. But really, we need a better action plan before we have to size up the wardrobe. Those puffy jackets are not cheap.

We’ve got to feel our emotions. Here goes…

First, greet them by name. The first major step to quieting our emotional ghosts is to give them a name.

Hello, frustration. I see you. You’re like that sad little girl in the Sixth Sense. You are trying to get my attention.

Next, explain the ghost to someone who can’t see it: Frustration buzzes in my head, it’s moving fast, it makes my shoulders tight, it tightens my quads. As you scan your body, an amazing thing can happen: your body feels acknowledged, and can relax a little.

Finally, sit with frustration and chat. Write the conversation down. Find out what the emotion wants. Like HJO’s ghosts, it probably wants attention. It might want you to take action.

I’ve been running from my frustration for the past few days. But, as Carl Jung has always known, what you resist persists.

So, I’m putting down the Ben & Jerry’s. I’m corking the Merlot. I’m coming out of my fort to talk. Sometimes. I mean, I’m not awesome at it, but I’m committed to practicing.

I don’t have to run from what I feel. Emotions are there to teach me something, and then they eventually go away. I can be a better student and listen… without ice cream.

And then, I’ll still fit in my winter gear… if I can ever figure out what to wear.

**P.S.… if you’re totally overwhelmed by emotions, see a therapist or coach or both. Especially if, like me, you have health insurance that covers it! There’s a reason it’s called a benefit. There’s a reason why intelligent people go. Everyone needs beneficial help… especially around the holidays. 🙂